THE COURT FOUNDVIOLATION8/31/2026
- RESPONSIBLE PARTY
- THE OTHER PARTY
- CODE STATUS
- NEW RULE PENDING REVIEW
- CONFIDENCE
- 95%
FACTS CONSIDERED
A man searched for the straw in his cup using his tongue in front of his buddy.
RULING
PAUSE — VIOLATION. The tongue is not a licensed straw-finding tool. The Court finds the conduct a clear breach of basic table dignity, and no supplied statute directly covers tongue-based beverage retrieval. The Court of Man Law has spoken.
REMEDY
The defendant must buy the next round, explain to the table why the straw was in the cup, and finish the drink with the straw in plain sight for the full duration of the conversation.